11 Ways to Help You Start Building Your Self-Esteem

By Reniel


Last Updated: March 28, 2022

Self-esteem, in a nutshell, is your view and love for yourself – no matter the circumstance or predisposition. Your opinion, overall sense of personal value and self worth may be low, high, or somewhere in between.

While everyone has concerns about themselves, low self-esteem can leave you feeling insecure and unmotivated. Fortunately, there are practical things you can do to build it. 


11 Ways You Can Start Building Your Self-Esteem

1. Avoid comparing yourself to others 

The reality of life is that someone will always be smarter, wealthier, more attractive, more successful, etc. than you. If browsing on social media leaves you not feeling good about yourself, make it a goal to decrease the time you spend on social media, go on a social media detox or completely stop using it at all if possible. 

Comparisons steal our joy and make us jealous of other people’s accomplishments, triumphs and celebrations.

If you feel inferior because someone else is making more money than you, got married overseas and other reasons that triggered feelings of envy, jealousy, etc., it’s time to break the comparison cycle by avoiding doing things that will make you feel inferior and not good enough.

Also, remind yourself that self growth needs a little more patience and kindness on your part. 


2. Mastering a new skill 

You increase your sense of competence as you become professional or good at something. Imagine how you will feel if you are better at something than people around you. You will be admired and respected for your knowledge and skills, which can be a great self-esteem booster


3. Listing your achievements 

We all have days when we feel extra insecure and anxious, but that doesn’t make us less of a person. Negative and unwanted emotions like these are part of human nature. During difficult days, it’s hard to be positive; but this is also a time to be gentle to yourself and look for ways to make you feel better, like listing your achievements. 

Think about all your accomplishments and all the things you were proud of. Write them down and check your list every time you’re feeling not good enough to remind you that you’re capable and have what it takes to attain your goals. 


4. Do something creative 

A perfect way to bring some beats and rhythm back into your life is by doing creative tasks.

The brain is motivated by imagination; the more you do it, the bigger the gains. When you realize how much you can do and your ability to learn, you will become more secure in yourself. 


5. Change your mindset

Your mind is your greatest asset, and it should be treasured. Change your mindset and stop yourself anytime you find your mind thinking poorly about yourself. Strive to find the roots of each negative thought  that crosses your mind and try methods that rid yourself of thoughts that are holding you back. 


6. Go far and beyond your comfort zone 

Robin Sharma once said, "As you move outside of your comfort zone, what was once the unknown and frightening becomes your new normal." 

Persuade yourself to go outside your comfort zone and reach your potential. Get uncomfortable and try something new - meet different  people, challenge yourself or try approaching a situation in a different manner than you would normally.

Dare to go beyond and leave your comfort zone to see how far you can go. Becoming daring and trying to put yourself out there will benefit you in one way or another.


7. Support somebody and become a mentor 

Support someone in need by lending a helping hand or becoming a shoulder they can cry on whenever you can. Let them know they are not alone. Always remember that you don’t need to do big things to change the world.

The seemingly little things you do could go a long way! 

  • Inspiring someone to take necessary actions to achieve their goals
  • Showing them how to do things better
  • Providing them a new perspective in their current situations
  • Listening to their problems with full attention, especially when they need it most

Helping a few people in need might not change the world entirely, but it could change their world. And when they show appreciation for the things you do for them, it has a profound effect on the way you think about yourself and helps you find more meaning into your life

For anyone who wants your help, your leadership, and your encouragement, be there! Their respect and appreciation will contribute to your self-esteem. 


8. Avoid trying to care about what people say 

Make a strong commitment to cease worrying about what others might think. Follow the advice of Dr. Seuss and be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don’t matter, and those who matter don’t mind. 


9. Let go of pessimistic people 

If there are negative people in your life who rain on your parade, you will feel drained and exhausted more often because they can suck the life out of you and make you feel insecure and bad about yourself.

They may have nothing good to say, may be intentionally putting you down, or could be taking advantage of you. Letting go of such people and influence is the right thing to do for your peace of mind and sanity. 


10. Accepting failures as a part of growth 

You failed at something because you tried and that’s better than not trying at all. Bear in mind that failure still means you are making an effort. If Thomas Alva Edison had given up any one of those 999 times, we would not have had the light bulb on his thousandth attempt! 

Remember that it’s a normal reaction to get disheartened by failure. But being harsh on yourself is not the right way to go about it. When you fail, use it as an opportunity to change your thinking, realizing that loss is a chance to improve.

Hang in there and don’t give up because it’s possible to turn pain and heartbreak into passion, strength and wisdom. When you use your mistakes to better yourself, you get new perspectives that will help you eventually regain your momentum.

Also, don’t forget to remind yourself that you are stronger than you are giving yourself credit for


11. Be a student 

Always remain a student and have a Shoshin, or "beginner's mind". This is an attitude that helps you to approach anything you do with a student's mindset. Shoshin will prompt you to learn something like a beginner would: open, ready, impartial, unprejudiced. 



Drawing Strength From These Self-Esteem Building Techniques 

These 11 ways to better self-esteem are not mere ingredients that make up a formula or course of action; they are each a source of power too. The moment you decide you want to do something that would make you value yourself more, you are on your way to empowerment!    

Photo by Kevin Malik


2 comments on “11 Ways to Help You Start Building Your Self-Esteem”

  1. This is what I needed to read to some years back when my kind of love for me was heating the rock. I must say had it not been the love for books, this Moses that is writing this comment would be 'some-how' in very bad shape.

    I read books on self improvement. Virtually books written by respectable authors in their fields. They have as I speak greatly shaped my thinking on life and many other things related to goal setting and achievement. Am happy to note, some of the ideals are in the article above. Thank you...

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