If you want to enjoy a healthy, harmonious love and relationship, it takes effort. Those who enjoy what they consider fulfilling, peaceful relationships will tell you that their relationship didn’t just automatically become wonderful. They worked at it, and most likely, they still do regularly.
Not everyone learns effective relationship or relating skills growing up. From communication to conflict resolution to giving and receiving, some people need some help in learning and practicing such skills.
The following are 7 relationship tools that you can learn and keep handy so that your relationship can thrive.
Regardless of what goes on in a relationship, committing to respecting each other is of utmost importance. Even when you’re engaged in some sort of conflict, you can still have and show respect for each other.
Make respect and honor a daily habit. When you wake up in the morning, make a fresh commitment to show respect no matter what unfolds that day. You know how you enjoy being honored and respected. Now think of how your respect will bless your partner.
This doesn’t mean you’ll never have a moment where you’re not walking in love. If you get snippy or out of line, immediately ask for forgiveness from your heart. This can help your relationship keep sailing smoothly and deepen your bond.
Communication is key in a relationship.
The good news about communication is that you can learn skills to improve the way you communicate. If you’re usually hesitant about voicing your concerns out of fear, you can learn to overcome that fear and understand that what you want and need matter.
If you and your partner get into arguments that get out of control, you can learn to defuse them before this occurs. You can learn to be better listeners and share from the heart. You can also unlearn behaviors that aren’t healthy, like stonewalling, projecting, name calling, screaming, and so on.
If you can’t tackle this on your own, consider getting a therapist to help you out. It’s worth the investment because it can take your relationship to a whole new level.
There will be plenty of opportunities to forgive one another in your relationship. Make the decision now to do so. Even if you don’t feel like it, you can choose to forgive your mate and let it go. This doesn’t mean that you condone unhealthy behaviors.
You should have firm boundaries surrounding them. However, if you or your partner say or do something that hurts the other, and are genuinely sorry and apologize, then decide to forgive and let go. It will serve your relationship well.
It’s easy to get into a rut in relationship where you start thinking of each other as opponents. Remember and remind yourself often that you’re teammates. You’re on the same side. When you can face life together as a team, life can feel so much lighter.
You’ll have more courage. If you haven’t told your partner lately that you’re glad you’re on the same team, let them know. They’ll appreciate it.
Have you gauged just how much quality time you and your partner are spending together?
In the beginning of relationships, it's easy to spend almost all your time together. The relationship is new, you're falling in love, and every moment you spend together feels like magic. However, over the years, many couples spend less time together and grow apart.
This is especially common for families that have children, as the children tend to take up most of the time.
If you want your relationship to thrive, you'll have to navigate your time together and be sure that some of that time is quality. Sitting on the couch or laying in the bed at night while both of you are on your iPhones not communicating with each other is not quality time.
There are many ways you can incorporate quality time into your life.
Have a discussion with your partner about how you'd like to spend quality time together regularly. Make a list and keep it handy so you don't forget.
To love unconditionally means that you love without conditions. If you want your relationship to thrive, commit to loving your partner unconditionally and asking them to do the same.
This doesn’t mean that you condone unhealthy behaviors. What it means is that no matter what you go through individually and as a couple, that you both give and receive love.
Think of it like this. If you have a child, they say and do things that upset you sometimes. Yet, you love them unconditionally. And, you want them to know that. In the same way, your partner will say and do things that upset you, irk you, scare you, etc.
They may even hurt you. Work through the issues and remember that you’ve committed to loving them unconditionally.
Every now and then, surprise your partner with a token of love and appreciation. This could be a compliment, a small gift, fresh flowers picked from your yard, a romantic date, spontaneous get-away, and so on.
You’d be surprised at how generosity and tokens of appreciation take relationships to a new level. Just think about how you like to be surprised with love and gratitude.
If your partner never does this and it’s important to you, let them know. You can even give them ideas if they’re not the best at knowing how to show appreciation this way.
No matter where your relationship is at right now, you can improve it.
Take these relationship tools into consideration and keep them handy. May your relationship thrive on all levels!
May 25, 2022