15 Things Mentally Strong People Do When the Going Gets Tough

Life comes with inevitable change – sometimes it’s easy and nice, other times it is hard and painful.

But whether we consider them good or bad is all up to us. True, some of these ups and downs may be stressful and add pressure to our lives, but it is always up to us to face them. 

And considering this, a lot of our responses to these hurdles are based on how mentally prepared we are. The quality of being “mentally strong” ceases to be another fancy word or cool thing to have, but a crucial survival tool.

Mentally strong people are able to jump on opportunities and make the best of them. They're also able to take the problems, obstacles and pressure life throws at them and turn them into lessons and opportunities to grow from.       

It all seems like a superpower when you talk about it this way. One is even tempted to wonder if these people are super-humans, or made of different stuff than the rest of us.

But the truth is that mentally strong people aren’t very much different from the rest of us.

You can become mentally strong. You just need to know what they do – especially when the going gets tough – then train yourself to do those things.

15 Ways to Get Through Tough Times by Being Mentally Strong

Life serves everyone lemons; below is how mentally strong people turn those into lemonade.

1. They detach themselves from the situation.

When unfortunate events occur, they don't allow themselves to spiral into self-pity and depression.

They don’t waste time wallowing, wondering why the whole universe has decided to conspire against them. They simply realize that it is an event that has happened, and all that is left to do is to respond in a helpful way.

2. They motivate themselves.

By letting go of self-limiting beliefs and beckoning on their inner strength, they give themselves the strength to face adversity.

They give themselves pep talks and encourage themselves to keep going.

3. They accept challenges.

Mentally strong people don’t go looking for problems, but are always ready to face one when it arises.

They don’t try to hide from it or even complain, but simply take it as part of life.

4. They focus on the things they can control.

Rather than worrying about the ninety-nine things they have no control over, they focus on the one thing they do and do their best at resolving that one.

5. They persevere.

They say, “when the going gets tough, the tough get going.”

Mentally strong people are able to stick to their goals through hell and high water, retaining enough endurance to weather the storm when they find themselves in helpless situations.

6. They quit.

Mentally strong people choose their struggles wisely.

They may decide to quit a certain course of action if they realize that it's not worth the effort, or would cost them something greater.

Mentally strong people have the courage to:

• admit when they are wrong
• chase an irrational ambition

Or realize they have simply missed the opportunity and they throw in the towel without feeling bad about it.

7. They practice self-care.

No matter the situation, they realize that they need to be in good mental, physical, spiritual, and psychological states to tackle the challenges. Hence, mentally strong people practice self-care, especially when they're going through difficult times.

8. They shuffle their priorities.

In the face of difficulty, mentally strong people make time to prioritize activities.

They decide what goals are worth chasing, enabling them to use their energy wisely. They don’t allow the heat of the moment or upsurge of pressure to overwhelm them into taking unproductive or regressive actions.

9. They set-up their environment for success.

Though counterintuitive, mentally tough people don’t always use their willpower to overcome challenges.

For instance, a mentally tough person might decide to:

• unfollow negative social media pages
• hide the cookie jar
• keep their phones in the other room in order to control their impulses

This doesn’t mean that they are weak, but that they are wise to conserve their willpower (which is finite).

10. They help other people.

Rather than obsessing about themselves, mentally strong people seek to alleviate the suffering of those around them.

This effect helps them rise above any pain and suffering, giving them the strength and courage to persevere and do something about the situation.

This also helps keep the spirit of everyone high, and keep them solution-oriented, rather than letting feelings of helplessness and despair take over.

11. They count their blessings.

Rather than complaining and whining, they practice gratitude, and this helps them see life from a clearer perspective.

This then enables them to draw strength from the past and also look forward in hope, with enthusiasm and confidence.

12. They reflect on the past.

They carve out time to consider past experiences – in order to learn the necessary lessons, and grow from the mistakes and pains.

13. They seek help and support.

When things get tough, they don't hesitate to reach out for help.  

14. They cry.

Mentally strong people properly process their emotions.

Rather than denying their emotions, or bottling them up – which is unhealthy – mentally strong people express their emotions. They cry and rejoice according to the events that occurred. 

15. They remain flexible.

Perhaps the most important quality of mentally strong people is their ability to adapt to changing times and situations.

They don’t force themselves to feel certain ways, or deny reality altogether, but are able to move from one emotional, situational, and environmental state to another without loss of hope, or direction.     

You Have What it Takes to Be Mentally Strong 

Being mentally strong is not the solution to every or any problem per se, but rather an optimal state for attacking, or at least enduring difficulties.   

Photo by Julia Larson

Editor's note: This article was originally published Jul 27, 2021 and has been updated to improve reader experience.