8 Hot Tips to Build and Maintain a Healthy Relationship

Do you consider your relationship healthy?
If so, how do you assess the ‘healthiness’ of your relationship?
If not, that is not the end of the world.

Love is one of the most complex human emotions as such, it is not surprising that relationships are not necessarily a walk in the park either. 

Whether it is your first or hopefully last relationship, we all have a picture of how we want it to look like. This looks different  for everyone. But for most, it includes support, understanding, compassion and all the other nice things we see on our favorite Instagram couple.

Relationships are not easy and each couple has their own struggles. What separates a healthy relationship from an unhealthy one is how they deal with those setbacks.

But how do you build and maintain those kind of healthy relationships?

These are some of the things you should consider to achieve the relationship of your dreams.   

8 Tips for a Healthy Relationship

Take care of yourself. 

Before you decide to be in a relationship with someone and love another person, the first step is to take care of yourself and your needs.

Being with someone means you have to be considerate of their needs. However, putting someone’s needs before yours might result in frustration and resentment.

Remember, you can’t pour from an empty cup, fill yours up first. 

Have time for intimacy.

Intimacy is more than just sex. It is a deeper level of personal connection. It is laying in bed cuddling, holding hands during walks or random forehead kisses. Being close to your partner ensures that your relationship has both romance and friendship needed to keep the spark alight. 

Talk with each other.

The importance of proper communication in relationships can never be underrated.

Take time to actually be present and talk with your partner. Genuinely listen, and do not interrupt your partner when they talk. Also, listen to understand rather than simply to respond.

When you do not understand, ask questions and ensure that by the end of the conversation, your partner feels heard. 

Have realistic expectations.

When we get into relationships, we all have expectations regarding what we want from our partner and how we envision the relationship to go.

There is nothing wrong with having this plan, but it needs to be realistic. 

Having unrealistic expectations will only set you up for disappointment. Also, stay away from comparing your relationship to that of the next couple. No two people are the same. Therefore, it is unfair to expect two relationships to be the same. 

Don’t expect your partner to change.

I am sure we have all come across people who force themselves into relationships hoping that they will change their partners into the ‘ideal’ version.

This just doesn’t work. And that is the truth that some of us fail to accept. 

Pro tip: If you don’t love someone for who they are, it is best not to get into a relationship with them rather than doing so and make them your next DIY project. 

Keep your word.

As simple as this might sound, not many people are able to honor their words.

If you say you’re going to do something or make plans with someone, follow through. 

Yes, life happens, and sometimes you might not be able to do so due to factors beyond your control. In such scenarios, communicate. 

Aim to always understand, not agree. 

Just because we are in a relationship with someone doesn’t mean that we should agree with everything they say or think. We are different people with different upbringings and values therefore, chances of us agreeing on entirely everything are quite low.

Focus on hearing your partner and understanding why they hold the opinions they have. Having different views is not a reason to fight, rather, it is a platform to understand each other and view things from different perspectives. 

Genuinely apologize.

The only thing worse than not getting an apology is getting a half-done and an disingenuous apology.

When you see the need to apologize to your partner, do so wholeheartedly. The first step towards this is understanding why you are apologizing. 

Apologies that sound like ‘I am sorry you feel that way,” or “I am sorry if I crossed your boundary,” are not even worth the title of being called apologies. Acknowledge what you did wrong and shift from making it seem like your partner is wrong for responding in a particular way. 

You Can Achieve the Relationship You Want 

We all want “perfect,” stable and healthy relationships, but most of us are clueless when it comes to how to achieve these relationships. 

There is no one size fits all for successful and healthy relationships. However, healthy and successful relationships often have these eight core features present. In my opinion, the main one being good communication. Such kinds of relationships also take time and patience to build, they are not found. 

However, that is not to say one has to endure the pain of an abusive relationship. All forms of abuse should never be tolerated. Most countries and states have 24 hour crisis helplines, talk to someone if you need any support. One abuse incident is enough for you to seek help.

Photo by Helena Lopes