Your Setbacks Don't Have to Be Failures: How to Regain Your Momentum

By Dominica

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Last Updated: May 13, 2024

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It’s quite common to experience a setback in your life.

No matter how intelligent or experienced you are, things don’t always go as planned – and that’s alright. The attitude you adopt during or after these times can determine the kind of life you live.

Part of life involves facing challenges. 

  • What do you normally do when challenges or setbacks come knocking on your door?
  • Do you spiral downward into sadness and depression?
  • Do you get angry or frustrated and carry around negative emotions? 
  • Have you given up on your wishes and dreams because of setbacks?

Whether you experience something that sets you back, or what you perceive is a complete failure, you can adopt the perspective that these are opportunities to learn and grow. They're chances to resist beating yourself up, apply positive thinking, and find out what you’re really made of.

The difference between highly successful people and unsuccessful people is that those who feel successful choose to learn from setbacks.

In fact, they tend to learn valuable lessons about themselves and life in general. They also tend to adopt a more positive perspective throughout their journey. 

That's not to say they weren't terribly disappointed when something didn't work out, or they were rejected, or they fell way short of their goals. That's normal, and we shouldn't gloss over those emotions.

Disappointment and embarrassment often come when we really want something - we wouldn't feel so strongly if we didn't. So give yourself time to feel the feels - and then, if you still really want it - get up, see what you can learn from the experience and use those lessons to try again.

It may not always be easy, but it is possible.

 

 

Make Positive Thinking a Habit

Begin thinking about what you will do the next time you face a setback or failure. 

You see, a failure may not really be a failure. Some people don’t label anything a failure, as they view everything as an opportunity to learn.

Just because you didn’t accomplish what you set out to do or the project didn’t go as planned does not mean you failed. It simply means you tried, learned some things along the way, and you didn’t get the desired effect.

Did you know Thomas Edison tried to make the light bulb thousands of times?

Some would say he failed every time that bulb didn’t light up, but he didn’t look at it as failure. He looked at it as a learning experience and was determined to just keep trying. As you know, he did succeed after many tries.

He didn’t keep a negative attitude and think, “Oh no, I’ll never be able to get this thing to work.” Rather, he engaged in positive thinking and said, “Oh yes! I will get this thing to work!”

Think of a toddler that’s learning how to walk. They stumble and fall down plenty of times, but that doesn’t make them failures. As adults, we encourage them to get up and keep trying.

We say, “Come on, keep trying. It’s alright. You got this!” They begin to understand that stumbling and falling are part of the process to master the skill of walking.

We can view our life endeavors the same way. Positive thinking can help, and we can make it a habit. Even if you stumble or fall, you’ll just get up and keep trying, learning lessons along the way.

Plenty of famous folks had setback after setback: 5 Famous People Who Overcame Adversity and Achieved Success

 

Persistence Pays Off

I know a woman who had the dream of publishing a book.

She began freelance writing and did that for a few years while learning about the publishing industry. When she sent out her book proposal to numerous agents, she began receiving rejection letter after rejection letter.

She could have looked at this as a failure. After all, rejection can be tough to swallow. However, she didn’t give up and she didn’t look at the rejections as failures. She decided before she even sent that first proposal out that she would engage in positive thinking no matter what happened.

She held firm that she would find an agent to give her book a chance, even if it took 1,000 proposals.

Guess what? One year later she got her break. After 86 rejections, revisions, and positive thinking, she landed her book deal! How’s that for persistence and payoff?

 

 

Gaining Momentum After Setbacks

Working toward a goal may not go as planned. 

Accept that up front. At the same time, dedicate yourself to getting up after a setback and get that momentum going again.

  • Learn from the experience.
  • If you can’t figure out what went wrong, perhaps you can reach out to a mentor or coach to help get some fresh insight. 
  • Sometimes we can’t quite see what happened or what lessons we can learn from an experience.

You may think you’re headed one way, but a setback could give you an idea to change course and head another way. That’s alright.

You may be enjoying swift success and then experience a dry spell. That’s alright too.

Attitude and perspective are what can help you navigate through any setback or slow time. Adopting an optimistic perspective is quite helpful too.

You can regain momentum after setbacks by changing your perspective and persisting in your endeavors.

 

 

Ask for Help - You are Not Alone

If you run into some challenges and need some clarity, know that there are plenty of people that would be willing to help you get some, including counselors, online communities, your friends and family.

You don’t have to navigate life alone. In fact, as humans, we’re wired for connection, so don’t be afraid to reach out for help.

And, remember that you can experience joy along the journey too. When we get so focused on the end goals, we can get in striving mode. We can get up and fly through the days carrying huge amounts of stress, tying our happiness level to the end goal.

Try to enjoy the journey. Take some time to unwind, rest, and play. You can keep momentum moving forward in all your endeavors, and learn to enjoy the whole process and journey.

That’s a wonderful goal, so no matter what, go for that kind of life journey.

Photo by Yaroslav Shuraev

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  • Anonymous says:

    depression
    It sounds great, however, when you are depressed the main you lack is the ability to sometimes even move. I just sit and in despear watch the hours pass.

  • Anonymous says:

    (No subject)
    I find this page very motivational and I decided to save it so I can go thru it again.

  • Ingrid Van Dyck says:

    THANK you

  • Thanks so much for confirming im on the right toad of recovery 🙏🏾

    • Sarah @ Daily Motivation says:

      Thank you Coach! Sometimes we all need a little reminder that we are being too hard on ourselves. The trick is not to fall off the horse, but to keep getting back up on it. 🙂

  • olinda carla fields says:

    Thank you for this. I really enjoy receiving this email every day!

  • Shay says:

    I definitely enjoyed this, but! why do everyone always assume we all have “Friends!” I’m totally alone in this latter part of my life. I know many people I consider friends, but no siblings, friends that aren’t in a nursing home, I’m not a “group!” I tried volunteering, it was ok, especially being a nurse of more than 40 yrs. But! I just need a “true friend!”
    One you can talk, share, and cry with, and their not looking at the time to go spend with their famlies, or other friends. I have some major health issues, but been told I’m the strongest person the’ e ever met. I’m simply depressed! Can’t afford my therapist, and lve in Allen where this mass shoot g occurred just a few blocks from my house. My childre, 4 adult, could care less about what they refuse to see happening in front of their eyes. They have to physically see you before! they could see tha. Gif I hate this. It’s like all my yesterdays were the happiest along with typical bad, but to be in this stage totally alone!!! is not something I know I can stay in. I’ve read ma y are in this situation, but! each one have at least one active true friend! I have nook e! No pity needed, but to motivate me is obviously not going to happen, as we were not promised anything in this life. This is my Hell! on earth. I pray each of you find “Joy!” in things to help you! Thanks for listening.

    • Sarah @ Daily Motivation says:

      Hello Shay, that sounds really hard, thank you for sharing with the community. You are not the only person who feels this way, and many people are also feeling the pinch in terms of not being covered by insurance, or not having the money to go to or keep up with therapy. You mentioned you have tried volunteering, but haven't found anything that quite stuck, or where you could find the kind of true friend you are looking for. Your comment inspired another article, 10 Sweet Apps for Finding Friends & Making Connections, because you're right, not everyone does have friends. Many people are able to reach out online, as it can open up your opportunities to find people with similar interests, goals or even complaints and concerns. It may not be exactly what you are looking for, but it could be worth giving it a try?

    • Sharlene Casey says:

      I too am a retired nurse with no true friend. I am thinking they don’t exist. People want you to listen to thier problems but not interested in hearing yours or supporting you. I get told you’re strong you can handle it!

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