If you’re like most people, you don’t want to settle for a life of boredom, unhappiness, or failures. Deep inside of us, we long for purpose and some level of success. Of course, the definition of success is different for everyone.
For one person, being successful could mean being the best mother or father they can be. For another, it may be owning a profitable business. Still, another could define success as simply feeling happy the majority of the time.
How do you define success?
It’s easy to get caught up in the rat race and the busyness of life. We spend time working, doing chores, going to appointments, raising kids, caring for elderly parents, socializing, and more etc.
All the hustle and bustle can cause us to feel quite weary. As a result, it’s easy to settle for status quo. We may settle for an average job, mediocre relationship, negative emotional states, and more – mainly because we’re just so tired!
But here’s the thing. We don’t have to settle. We can live not only a successful life, but a happy and adventurous life! Sure, we’ll have some days that aren’t the best. Life throws things our way that can cause emotional mayhem. However, we don’t have to live in that state all the time.
We can learn to make the kinds of changes that will create the kind of life we truly desire.
One key is to take 100 percent responsibility for our life.
That means that you commit to making no more excuses as to why you can’t do this or do that.
I used to be stuck in victim mode. I grew up in a dysfunctional family with parents that weren’t as present as I needed them to be. That led me to having low self-esteem and feeling low caused me to not even try to accomplish my goals.
At times, feeling little self-worth caused me to not even create goals.
However, as I started to journey on my personal development path, I learned to take responsibility for my life. This included my mental and emotional life. I drew a line in the sand and said, “No more!” to feeling powerless.
I reached out for help and began to walk a different path toward peace, joy, and wholeness.
Creating the kind of life you desire means giving up using excuses as to why you can’t do it.
This means not complaining when someone else gets the promotion. You just keep trying. It means letting your childhood experiences mold you into a better person today, rather than saying they’ve messed you up forever.
It also means that you must stop pointing fingers at others for your problems.
Can you take some time to look at yourself and why things are the way they are? Are you completely satisfied in your relationship, finances, social skills, career, spiritual, and physical life? Chances are that you have room to grow and the time to begin is now.
Jim Rohn is America’s foremost business philosopher, and he says,
“You must take personal responsibility. You cannot change the circumstances, the seasons, or the wind, but you can change yourself.”
The past is that past. Let bygones be bygones. Let your pain motivate you toward success, let your fears propel you to take a leap of courage, and leave your critics standing in the dust.
Stop blaming your parents, your friends, coworkers, and spouse for your lack. You can be as successful as you want to be – and define success in a way that resonates with you.
Change can be challenging, but change is necessary for growth. If you don’t like where you are, then you have to do things differently. There are so many resources available to help you to achieve whatever your goals may be.
There are books, audios, teachers, classes, Life Coaches, therapists, and a variety of other resources you can utilize to grow and become successful.
The Twelve Step recovery groups define “insanity” as “doing the same things over and over and expecting different results”. If you are not getting the results that you want, then you have got to do something different.
Sit down and evaluate where you are in your life. Gauge where you are emotionally, physically, spiritually, career-wise, and relationally. Start a journal to write out your thoughts, feelings, emotions, and goals. Track your progress.
Write down some goals as to where you would like to be and then create an action plan toward achieving those goals.
Print your goals out and post them in a spot around your home or office that you can see daily. It is a great idea to recite those goals out loud several times a day. Keep them in your focus and continually be taking steps toward achieving them.
This isn’t to say you’ll never have a bad day, encounter struggles, or want to settle in some way.
You likely will, and that’s alright. Life is full of ups and downs. What matters is that you learn to climb back up and not get stuck in the valleys.
And, if you do, know what you can do to get some momentum going. For me, this means asking for help from a friend, mentor, or professional. When I allow myself to be vulnerable and simply say, “I could use some help”, my life gets better.
I will close with a quote by best-selling author, Richard Bach and give you permission to create the kind of life you truly desire.
“Sooner or later, those who win are those who think they can.”
What would a “win” look like for you?